“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” Isaiah 43:2
There was a time shortly before Sarah died that God highlighted this verse to me. I took it to mean that she was going to be okay. I mean, He promised that He would be with me…that the waters would not sweep over me…that I would not be burned or set ablaze by the fire. To me this meant that things would go exactly as I wanted. That my baby girl would live and be healthy and happy. After she died I had a true revelation of what He meant. It says WHEN you pass through the waters and rivers…WHEN you walk through the fire. Following Jesus doesn’t mean that you won’t suffer in life or have bad things happen. We live in a world where everyone is free to make their own choices (God doesn’t want to control us) and the world is full of sin. There are consequences to sin, which results in all the suffering and bad stuff that goes on. So, though being a Christian doesn’t mean you won’t suffer, it does mean that when you do you have a personal God that will walk with you through it all…that will keep you from being consumed by the waters and the fire (fear, anxiety, hopelessness, depression…). It has now been a year since we lost our Sarah and I truly understand the promise He made to me before she died. Though it hurts, I am making it through with continued hope, joy, and peace because He is with me, which has kept me from being consumed by the fire. He has been by my side through every moment of anger…every tear that I’ve cried…every lonely moment. He wants to walk with you too. Simply invite Him into your life.
April 17th marked one year since I gave birth to Sarah. Morgan, Samuel, and I went to Keauhou Bay to remember our daughter (Samuel’s sister). The Bay is where we spread her ashes. We played “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” (Israel Kamakawiwo'ole's version, of course), prayed, and threw some pink plumerias into the ocean as we did last year. It hurt as it did then, but we released her to God once again and we were at least able to rejoice in the fact that she is in heaven with our Jesus.